Navigating fertility challenges is already so hard. Dealing with people’s insensitive comments makes it even harder. That’s why we want to help! We’re offering tips and advice from the community on how to handle hurtful remarks. We also created guides for loved ones that can help them understand what you’re going through and teach them how to better support you.
Let’s face it, sometimes our friends or family can say things that feel unkind, which can make spending time with them super stressful. We hear you! That’s why our OUT LOUD INSIDERS are sharing some of the most outrageous questions or comments they’ve received and how they’ve dealt with it.
Christina Rodriguez, @christinanrodriguez
The truth of the matter is
that as we age our fertility is impacted, but being
reminded is
insensitive and
not helpful. Beyond that,
the age that fertility
challenges occur can vary
from person to person. This
isn’t one size fits all...!
Jess Oakes, @jessicasoakes
People don’t say this to be mean, but it’s difficult to
hear when you’re doing
everything to get pregnant.
Education is your key here.
Say something like ‘Wow,
that’s incredible, but please
know comments like that
are really hard to hear when
you can’t get pregnant—
with or without trying.’
Victoria Nino, @expectinganything
Because I used an egg donor, many people are confused
about whose baby it is. My
typical response is ‘Yes, it is
my baby. My daughter
shares genetics with our
donor, but the mothering is
ALL me. I grew my
daughter’s embryo from a
tiny speck to a healthy baby
and have nurtured and loved
her ever since.’
Most people don’t realize they're being hurtful when they say or ask insensitive things. So, use those situations to set boundaries. Swipe through common phrases and questions that can help communicate to your community why certain remarks aren't okay and suggest how they can better support you.
Help us spread the word! Download each slide to post on your Instagram and Facebook story—and don't forget to tag @fertilityoutloud
You don’t know if I’ve been trying for a while or
the
problems I may be facing. Frankly, it’s no
one’s
business. Instead, let me come to you with
that news.
No one likes being told to “relax”; it’s not helpful.
So
instead of SAYING it, help me DO it by
offering
to hang out or go for dinner, or by just letting me vent.
You have no idea the avenues I’ve explored so far. There
are lots of different options like IUI, IVF, IVC, surrogacy,
and yes, adoption…but maybe we just aren’t there yet.
Conceiving naturally may not happen for me, but that
doesn’t mean I don’t deserve to be a parent. This journey
takes a lot of strength and that
should be celebrated.
Everyone’s dream of what their family looks like is
different. I’m still determined to make
mine a reality.
I’d love nothing more than to be a part of the “parenting
woes” club. So, please stop trying to show me the silver
lining; it feels like you’re
writing off my pain.
When it comes down to it, your partner and loved ones just want to be supportive—but they may need a little help or educating to do so. These guides were made to share with those around you to help them understand your journey and how they can be there for you.
10 Ways to Be a Supportive Partner
Send your partner these tips on how they can better be there for you throughout the journey
Understanding My Fertility Journey
Educate loved ones on the treatments and procedures you may experience and how they may make you feel
Dealing with infertility is easier with a supportive community. Follow us on Facebook and Instagram to hear more advice and connect with people who know what you’re going through.
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CloseThe winner will win an all-inclusive getaway for two to Miraval Arizona Resort & Spa, Tucson, including:
flights
2-night hotel stay
meals
spa credit
Retreat to the Miraval Arizona Resort and Spa in Tucson, Arizona, where the sun shines 350 days a year and nurturing specialists curate mindful experiences to live life in balance and at your best. If selected, you and your partner will have the opportunity to select one of three weekends (October 5-7, October 26-28 or November 9-11, 2018) to enjoy an all-expenses paid two-night stay in a Sunrise King Bedroom featuring indoor & outdoor showers, a roman soaking tub, floor to ceiling windows and private outdoor patio facing the Catalina Mountains. You will have access to all Miraval has to offer including couples spa services, unlimited meals, snacks and nonalcoholic beverages, a bottle of wine with dinners, nightly resort credits , a personal wellness consultant and unlimited access to more than 120 wellness activities including daily yoga, meditation, lectures, hiking, mountain biking and fitness classes. Round-trip flights and ground transportation are also included in this relaxing getaway for two!
Entering the #TalkAboutTrying Story Contest is easy. By May 11, 2018, complete the following:
Story Requirements
The story portion of the contest is your opportunity to make your submission stand out. We encourage you to share your personal challenges and triumphs with fertility as well as words of advice or support for other women and couples who may currently be navigating fertility obstacles of their own.
Stories must meet the following requirements:
About the Judging Process
After the submission deadline of May 11, 2018, the judging process will happen in two steps:
The winner of the contest will be announced on the My Fertility Navigator Facebook page the week of June 25, 2018.
Timeline